Dear blog,

This is a time of crisis in my life again that I choose to give up my accountant post. I have lost enough friends already. This post make me many sleepless night and no interest in doing anything else. From a start, I am really very excited in this new job and willing to face the challenge ahead of me. Until recently, I can see that my immediate superior is slowly giving up hope and patient in me.

From the way I ask her simple question to solve certain issue in my work, she would now make so many comment that I do not have accounting sense and lacking of experiences. And telling me that the accounts I am in-charge are actually a small account and if I cannot cope, then what can I do.

These comments are hurting. Who at first promise me that they will guide me and help me out when I face these problems. If I cannot cope with these job scope, why in the first place transfer me to do this accounts and promote me? Are these people trying to force me to resign? I begin to not trusting anyone anymore. Who can I trust? Yes, maybe only God.

The devils are attacking me all over. Will vengeance help? Must I take revenge?

I choose to me alone now. Everyone I use to trust can't be trusted. From the day of my first love. I love her. But now, where is she. Yes, I should not be so self-fish. I want her to be happy. I want her to have a good life. Then I got to choose not to see her. Not to make her flash back those beautiful memories we had together. I love her. And now still thinking of her. Maybe that because I have not yet find a replacement. I wish her to be the most blessed women in the world.

Shall I quit my job? Or shall I stay and get transfer and be demoted to do something less stressful? But I will still be lonely in that company. Because all my enemies are around me, making me sleepless, worry and angry.

God, I only trust you. Will you help me?